Mary refused to set goals and tried her hardest to convince the rest of the class that goals were a waste of time.  When the topic in class was substance use/abuse, Mary sabotaged the lesson sharing with the class about her sister's illegal drug use and described how her sister is "just fine."  Mary went as far as announcing to the class that her sister wanted to beat me up for saying that people who use "weed" are making bad choices.

Mary made it clear on the End of Semester Evaluation that the class was a big boring waste of time, how wrong it was, how she didn't learn anything, and capped it off with how much she hated me!  That's the background.

Fast forward to a somewhat recent Facebook "friend request" from Mary.  After some casual conversation she wrote, "Ya know, all those times in class when I wasn't listening?  I really was, and used a lot of what you taught me this year and especially today."   WHOA! Where was this going?

We proceeded to dialogue through Facebook.  We exchanged phone numbers and have texted back and forth.  Mary texts me about everything from help with boys to what color to paint her nails.  She has even invited me to every soccer game she's had this month.  Mary admits that she does not have the greatest home life and asks for my advice daily.

The most telling text came one night when some friends were pressuring her to smoke weed. She refused, telling them that she had made a decision not to use drugs after learning about their consequences.  Towards the end of the summer, Mary texted me and asked me to be her Godmother. The girl who hated me and everything I stood for, asked me to be her Godmother!

It is because of my work with Santa Fe Youth Services that I met Mary and have been able to be part of something so awesome.  My experience with Mary has changed my life.  Thank you Santa Fe Youth Services for giving me the tools to teach Mary and young people like her!

Speaking from the Heart

Take a mother who speaks very little English, and a daughter who speaks no Chinese, and it's likely there are more than a few communication problems. That was the case with Nikki and her mother, Joy. As a result, Nikki was drawn to the connected feeling of the drug-ridden gang scene. It took family therapy with Santa Fe Youth Services for Nikki to reveal that she had been feeling angry and disconnected from her mother because of three simple words. During a counseling session, Nikki was urged to tell her mother what she was feeling. With an angry tone in her voice and tears welling in her eyes, Nikki said, "Mom, you have never told me that you love me. When I tell you that I love you and you don't say it back, I don't feel like you care about me. I feel bad inside." At this point, Joy said, "I love you. I thought you knew because I cook for you. I wash for you. I drive you to school and pick you up. Now, I know that you need me to tell you." Both had tears in their eyes as Joy hugged her daughter and told her, "I love you."

"I need to know I am loved"

SFYS home-based Counseling Programs focus on reducing youth behavioral and emotional problems while addressing substance abuse risk factors. The results are more positive family interactions, reduced family conflict and more effective parental support.

Still Waters Run Deep

Teresa was one of the quiet ones. Using drugs helped her hide the scars of domestic violence she and her mother suffered. She was reluctant to open up to her counselor and classmates in SFYS Reconnecting Youth program. She believed speaking up would only invite judgment to take its place among shame and guilt in an already tormented soul.

Tragically, Teresa's mother did not survive her husband's beatings. And, just when she thought life could not land one more devastating blow, Teresa found herself pregnant. But, the story doesn't end with another single mother struggling to survive. Relying on the relationships and skills developed in Reconnecting Youth, she stopped using drugs, graduated in the top five percent of her class, and now attends college.

"If I can just survive today, I know
tomorrow will be better."

Empowering adolescents and their families to live productive lives is a goal we strive to achieve, knowing that no matter how dark the world seems, there will always be a Teresa to light it up.
SFYS Reconnecting Youth program is a school-based intervention program designed to help high-risk youth stay in school and increase their school performance, manage emotional distress and decrease drug involvement.

Never Too Late to Change

Evelyn found herself running out of options to help her son, Roland. His issues with trust and self-esteem caused him to act out at school and against his mother. When the two enrolled in the Strengthening Families Program at his middle school, it seemed like their last chance to make things right. Roland and Evelyn attended every session; always walking home together to discuss the evening's topic. Tragically, the night before the final session, Evelyn died of a heart attack in her sleep. Equally as tragic, Roland found her the following morning. To everyone's surprise, a clearly heartbroken Roland came to the meeting that evening. With head down and tears in his eyes, he explained that he didn't want to miss the last session because his mother was so proud that they were graduating. Roland poured out his feelings of immense gratitude for helping him learn to trust others and for the chance to build a closer relationship with his mom.

SFYS Strengthening Families Program combines youth and parent training, providing the skills needed to set boundaries, respect others, and improve communication among family members.